Nov 7, 2013 | Bout News
The Blocking Dead: Gardas open season with 193-70 win over Dolls
The Garda Belts made a strong first step towards the Golden Skate Saturday, with Gotham transfer Slambda Phage leading the charge in a breakout performance at jammer. This is Fire Wally reporting from the derby capitol of the MidBest.
On the first jam of the bout, Dolls jammer Shiver Me Kimbers shot through the middle of the Garda Belts’ wall, leaving Slambda Phage stuck in the pack. The Dolls blockers kept Slambda back long enough for Kimber to get a half-track lead on Phage, then cleared out the back of the Garda wall allowing Kimber to score three and call off the jam.
On the subsequent jam, Scootaloo lined up for the Gardas against Kayzilla. While Scoot fought through the Dolls wall at the front, Second Hand Smoke pushed Zilla out and ran back, drawing a track cut penalty as the Dolls jammer re-entered in front of her. With Scootaloo now on a power jam, The Garda line of Smoke, Myrna Ploy, Knoxher Blokhof held back a dolls blocker, keeping the pack slow to allow Scoot to rack up 18 points before time expired.
A series of defense-heavy jams followed that left the Gardas leading 25-9 with 12 minutes in the first half and bringing Shiva Shankin to jam against Psycho Novia, returning to jam for the dolls this season. Shiva squeezed around the outside of the Dolls wall for lead jammer while the pair of Second Hand Smoke and Wolfe Bite, blocking shorthanded for the Gardas, trapped Psycho Novia at the back of the pack. Dolls Rookie Kung POW Bitchin’ delivered a massive thump to Shiva on her first scoring pass, setting up Hanna Belle Lector, Winona Collider and Norwegian Mafia to swarm and trap the green jammer until a split pack forced them to release. Hanna briefly received the jammer star before the jam was called for time, with Shiva scoring 10.
After another quick five points for Phage, Gardas led 40-9 with 8 minutes in the half. From there, the Dolls began to strike back, with a 10-point Shiver Me Kimbers jam following a 4-point jam by Destiny’s Problem Child. Rookie DPC then came out on a Power Jam opportunity, juking tenacious blocking by the Garda wall of Wolfe Bite, Dr. Sorders, and Soft Serve to score 14 points and narrow the Gardas’ lead to 40-23 with 5 minutes in the half.
Slambda Phage then lined up against Saggitearitup, and something special happened. After a quick in-to-out juke to clear the pack for lead jammer, Phage opened the tap and out poured the points. Well-timed offensive blocks from Tara Bichapart and Second Hand Smoke activated Phage’s first scoring pass. A dolls jammer penalty enabled the green wall to keep the dolls blockers seperated and Phage lapping the pack. After time had expired and the dust had settled, Phage had racked up an exceptional 40 points for the Gardas. Kimber earned back 8 points for the Dolls on the next jam, making the score 80-45 Gardas at the half.
A series of low-scoring jams started the second half, bringing the score to 85-49 Gardas with 16 minutes on the clock. Slambda grabbed lead on the next jam with Dolls rookie Kung POW Bitchin’ not far behind. KPB ran into penalty trouble at the end of the jam, allowing Smoke and Phage a chance to widen the Garda’s margin to 119-51 with 11 minutes on the clock. A Dolls power jam followed, with Kimbers scoring 19 to bring the Dolls closer. On Kimber’s second scoring pass, Naughty Kitty lined up a boneshaking hit on Gardas rookie Maul E. Coddle to welcome her to the Fabulous Roy Wilkins Auditorium and clear the path for Kimbers. Dolls had brought it to 125-70 with 8 minutes remaining.
From there, the Gardas ran away with it. Phage racked up a 20-point jam immediately followed by a 30-point jam, employing strength and agility that should make her a valuable addition to the Gardas and the league. Frigid O’Shaughnessy and Shiva Shankin added 9 and 10, respectively, making the final tally 193-70 in favor of the Garda Belts.
Box Score
GARDA BELTS — 193 Points
17 Lead Jams
16 Jam Wins
8 Power Jams
119 Points Off Power Jams
33 Grand Slams
22 Slambda Phage — 8-10 LJ, 121 pts
1072 Shiva Shank’n — 4-6 LJ, 27 pts
FU Scootaloo — 2-5 LJ, 18 pts
9 Second Hand Smoke — 1-1 LJ, 15 pts
-0 Frigid O’Shaughnessy — 2-5 LJ, 12 pts
DAGGER DOLLS — 70 Points
10 Lead Jams
9 Jam Wins
4 Power Jams
33 Points Off Power Jams
8 Grand Slams
667 Shiver Me Kimbers — 6-7 LJ, 48 pts
4 Destiny’s Problem Child — 3-6 LJ, 20 pts
313 Kung POW Bitchin’ — 0-3 LJ, 2 pts
1A-3 Sagittearitup — 1-3 LJ, 0 pts
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