Atomic Bombshells: Season 10

Oct 30, 2013 | Bout News

Captains: Messi Jigler & Crowella de Vil

Potential jammers: Fannie Tanner, Crowella de Vil, Freeze Baby, and a huge field of maybes

Last year’s ranking: 9th season champions

Number of Golden Skates: 3 (3rd, 6th, and 9th season)

Last season

The Atomic Bombshells:

Stormed the track and defeated all comers in the season-long hometeam tournament.
Fielded a roster that rivalled high-ranked interleague travel teams.
Lost only one game (a Gilded Steak half-bout).
Triumphantly raised the Golden Skate for the third time.

When you factor in Fannie Tanner’s broken collarbone early in the season and the surprise loss of newcomer Crowella de Vil on a nine-month injury, you start to realize how deep that roster really had been. Now, the ABS had many near-misses; their game against the Gardas last year went down to the final jam (111-108), while the championship bout against the Rockits came within 15 (115-102). But in those final minutes, they knew how to play the game and work the clock to their own advantage. They made the right choices, and they took the wins.

This season

Let’s not go down the path of “It’s a whole new day!” Only super-speedster L’exi-Cuter and Team USA blocking star Juke Boxx have taken the All-Star only option. Venus Thightrap, Lizzy the Axe, Flora Flipabitch, and Mitzi Massacre have either hung up their skates or moved out of state, but that still leaves much of the ABS’ pack in play. Opposing jammers will still have to deal with that central core of blockers in heavy rotation. Hurtrude Stein, Diamond Rough, Madame de Stompadour, and Smoka Hontas are going to continue their reign of pack domination…but the challenge will be to train in the new crop.

The Top Bombshells this year are Messi Jigler and Crowella de Vil, two of our leagues’ finest transferees. This should be fun to see; Crow blew into town early last season after wowing crowds in Baltimore, played one incredible bout…and then had to sit out for the rest of the season. Crow’s a stunning jammer with fuel to spare; there’s a strong bet that she’ll be working to spin up the rookies into jamming monsters. Messi is entering her third year as part of the MNRG after playing with the Fargo/Moorhead Derby Girls – she’s clearly has taken this league and this team as her home. Calm and focused on the track, she’s a pack player who’s just as good as she jams.

Crow spoke of her team’s 1-1 record in the Gilded Steak tournament last week as a harbinger of things to come in this season. “If the mini-tournament is any indication,” she said, “we think it’s going to be a season of good, close games! A third of our team had never skated in an MNRG bout before October, so we were very impressed with their teamwork and their ability to adjust strategy and performance from the first bout to the second bout.”

The captains are going to have some challenging calls to make and a lot of training ahead. This team hasn’t taken so many rookies since the Incredible Seven (Diamond, Skully, Tara Skatesov, Shady O’Dread, L’exi, Jocelyn D’Jewels, and Mae Gusta) of Season Five, and the rosters of the last year skew heavily towards the All-Stars on the team.

Who are these newly-minted Bombshells? We asked their captains to introduce them to you:

Crowella de Vil and Messi Jigler:

Steel Magnailia: Strong and smart, with just the right amount of sass. We see her as a great addition to our blockers and forming walls of STEEL.

Ms. B’Hayven: Another great blocker addition! Ms. B’Hayven is a real team player and can deliver a wicked blow, as well as create solid walls.

Roley Ann Lena: Fast, agile, and has the drive to keep pushing through a pack. She’ll be jammin’…jammin” til the jam is through. But don’t be surprised if you see her tearing it up in the pack!

Mugsy Marauder: Great versatility, skating skills, and awesome all-around player. Look for her in the pack and wearing the star throughout the season.

Terror Swift: Are you Enchanted? We are. But this is no Love Story: this is one derby gal who’s ready for action, whether it’s in the pack or wearing the star. No one is Safe and Sound from her attacks when she’s on the track.

Chris Tea Pain: Roller derby sweetheart? Perhaps, but don’t let that fool you! This gal has the know-how to dominate. She’s a quick learner and a perfect addition to our ABS pack of blockers.

The center of all of the action: Why do the Bombshells win? Pack cohesion. They play together, they block together, and they call – and receive – plays together. They are where your opponent wants to be. All the time. Every jam. In your face, changing your life, throwing shoulders that can crack marble. If the vets can pass this on to their rookies…get ready to see a repeat.

Jamming is nigh: With Fannie Tanner and Freeze Baby as known quantities in the jammer lineup, the field is wide open for new jammers. We expect to see Crowella de Vil wearing the star, but last week’s Gilded Steak bouts lead us to believe that we’ll be seeing more of Mugsy, Roley, and perhaps a few others scoring for the ABS. Who’s going to rise to the occasion?

Denying the power jam: Every team can lose it on the track when their jammer goes to the box…but when an ABS scorer goes to sit for a minute, the Bombshells have their ace in the hole. Hurtrude Stein traps jammers and does not let them go. Why recycle a jammer when you have a blocker who can get in their head and match their every move?

There you have it. The Atomic Bombshells have an excellent shot at a fourth Golden Skate, but they’ll need every orange-wearing skater to make it happen. Their bench is still stuffed with extraordinary players; their challenge will be transform each one of their newest players into proud holders of that ABS legacy.

Bombs away.